The Suns shine

All the people around me inspire me. I am quite, very sure that all the people that would or have read this have helped me to go back again to myself, that means go on, or just stay on the round-way of my life. One very special person, who helped me to take another step once again, to come to those thoughts, would have a tea in front of her now and read another time this- thank you for her.

The roundway of life...
I so love life as it is. Sometimes it seams that some people just cannot get over their problems- always the same issues. That is perhaps because of the fact that they try to solve their problems, by always using the same solution. So in that way sending us the same obstacles we have to overcome, by understanding what we need to improve in ourselves. Always the same rounds of life, always coming back to youself. I have stopped getting angry at others, because the fact that something bad happens to me come all down to my attitude and behaviour. The sentence that helps me to go on, love the processes, is "change what you can and do not try o change something that you cannot change."

The bridge to tomorrow...
At the moment I feel just so wonderful, the day has been awesome and I would like that to pass on to tomorrow, not sleeping. Of course that would mean a bit more sleepy happy me. I am afraid that something could happen durning my sleep- the bridge to tomorrow- and I would not feel as well.

The lighthouses of my life...
I feel here that my balancepoint has changed. Me, as a tomorrow´s child, planning on, I have even more connected with travelling. Because of that I had a problematic question for me- what about stability. The answer to that lays in my lighthouses. As I have the inspiring people as you, who are still in my home, in my city, in my country, I have the balancepoint. Sometimes when I might disappear for myself, lose myself, I get strenght and guidence from your light.

In the past months I have begun to appreciate light. The light of sun that shines on everybody regardless of the social status or nationality, the warmth of souls, the beauty of people.

I would like to say thank you, but the cannot replace the sense of care and warmth of a hug.

there is a sign in the sky...

Sometimes it is so easy so see, feel and sense that everything is in the right tracks. The moments and years when it is not needed to make too much effort for something that is right for you...make it possible to notice the little things and to enjoy the moments, to live in those moments and develop.

Every night I get home, I meet a rabbit, which is such a nice reminder of my superb wonderland. Although I am not Alice, I still have the rabbitholes, clocks and tea.
And today arrived nmy new teapartner- my new roommate from Italy. The first one who shares my passion for tea- even in such a warm weather like 30-40 degrees has we have had for the last days.

I feel at the moment... like having a peasoup. No, actually... I feel like I am living in history. From one side being come from an event that described the life here in Jena, in 60-90´s till today through the perspective of underground political organisations that fought for a free Germany, it is interesting to feel that people are not in a comfort zone, like to feel the ultimate freedom ect. I could have comparison with the ansambel Propeller and Vennaskond, punkrock and singing revolution. What makes this day perfect and even better than the whole week having grillparties with different people, it that the former leader of one punkrock movement is my friend and said some nice and warm, wise words to me. What makes it even nicer is that his name is Fritz who I have mentioned earlier. The connection with earlier is important, the name is important and ironic.

I am happy that I have the opportunity to improve my work experience. All is not soo wunderschön, but there must be something that could be better. I will work on that one... well that is my work afterall.

As a normal thing would be talk a little about Germans, while they are my life, family and love at the moment. I do not know if that could be too simple, but the best workds describing germans, that hit the nail on the head exist in their language and I would dare to say only in their language. The sound, the attitude of the words even give foward the characteristics. The magic words could be "süB/süss/" and "nett". According to that theory there should be some words that cannot give foward the idea of Estonian better that any others and they must be in Estonian.



-
/The sky is under my feet.../

Something practical- numbers!

I will write here all the numbers I know ;)What could these numbers symbolise in my life...
1. 27.01.91
2. 2
3. 7
4. 1
5. 18
6. 07747
7. 5
8. 18


The key:
1. b-day :)
2. number of roommates- italian and rumanian
3. at what time I wake up whatever day it is- because of the workmen reneovating my house
4. When will I come to Estonia
5. What is the number of my house?
6. The zipnumber?
7. How many Estonians are here in Jena

MY AADRESS: W. SeelenbinderstraBe 18, 07747 Jena, Germany


8. The number of my children

black, red and yellow

Where did my spend my day before today- of course watching the game!

I was actually at a quite a charming place on the riverside, an outside cafe, where it is very cosy. The came being so interesting was a total pain-in-the- ass for those who were bierfans, as most of them here. Every time that somebody went to the toilet again, there was a goal hit.

I could see something else in that game- as a symbolic match between my future and past, future won, of course. Because me being from a English- class, from a school that is considered fansy, by the ones who go there, England has played quite a role in the past. This future thing is more than clear.

The most interesting was at that match a comment from my new friend, how it is the first time, when german flags are basically ebverywhere and everybody are proud here, love, adore their country and do it very openly. Connected with the history, overdoing with the flagthing has been considered rather over the border.But now not... the newest thing here is to put the flag like a sock on car side-way-mirrors.

And after the game we had our own game, which was also quite a lot of fun. It is just unbelievable how big fans they are here- even the children talk about it in the kindergarten and have their matches...But what is more about this game is that, it is the teamgame, so they are not just proud of one athlete and his trainer, but all nation is a winner.

I feel like being in a wonderland, that for sure. I even to not know where to start- of course- the rabbit. I was again walking along the rails that lead the way to my house and a rabbit come with me to the same direction. The moon was up, my pleasant talking partner continued his way on the tram, the air so warm and through breathing in the nighty air, I felt as if I was in a Jasminebush...

So today as a day of suprises- my roommate, leaving tomorrow gave me an African- furry- cow, a very funny one and self-made, as the name could give you a hint. I celebrated a fellow Estonian brithday giving him a cake with candle. But the most magical was the first day at my workplace. My morning started today quite early, among the children. The teacher took a paper flower, that was like a flower that had not blossomed and when she put it in the water, it slowly opened, and there was written "herzlich mitkommen mit dem Hasen(Wolcome to the bunny-group)" After receiving a sunflower and gifts that were in such cases when I was unhappy or had lost my sunshine, I can use those means...So everything is so nice, cute and happy around me- starting from the flowers, the African cow smiling at me, children, finishing with me from fingers to toes.

Päris veider oli tänane kommipakkumine lasteaias. Need kalevikommid, mis teadagi pigem lapsevaenuliku pakendiga olid, käisid enamikel meie lastel ka üle jõu. Kuid kui nad jõudsid šokolaadini, muutusid nad veel rõõmsamaks. Teadagi sisaldab see pruun kakaomass sama struktuuriga hormooni, mis meid õnnelikuks teeb. Ilmselt ka seepärast nähakse selles tujutõstjat.

Happy-guppy-lappy-vuppy day to you too :)

The connections...bzzz... and the cultures

The ones who have lived here more than my six days, always tell that "Oh, that is Jena- everybody knows everybody or you will meet those two times a day in our town." So besides that this little town connects as many people as are in Tartu quite closely then some of them are even more closely connected.

So the story behind this introduction is quite simple... I went to watch the last spanish match with spanish people who are here. To meet them we had one street in the old town, before one gate and passage. As we had time I popped into, looked what was in that gate and found out that there was a cafe and an organisation there that has grown out o anti-nazi movement. There I met an Estonain boy who his here a chef. So there I met a bunch of interesting people. The history of that organisation reminded me of Estonian fight for the freedom in the end of 80´s. As I was rushing to the match I just stayed there a couple of minutes.

Spanish people have their little community here, which is nice. I quess is it easy to find their fellow due to their overwhelming nature. Among ten spanish people, yelling and jumping and drinking, was quite a fun experience to be. The most important at that hour was the ball that went back and towards in Johannesburg. Some men started crying and praying when some of their men were injured or just down. Beside yelling "buta" or "por favor", there was one who was like a sports commentator, talking funnily, like "Villa saw in that gate the face of his cousin when hitting the goal..." They being fascinated in the football fascinates me, so is in the case of germans.

I quess what what was interesting for me is that football, food or words are the tip of an iceberg, the daily side of culture that unites the people of one country. From there I could draw some conclusions- each side of culture, is it cousine, sport or language, should have a daily and simple, usable face. When we use more often these new words from English or elsewhere and are proud of the language the most on the 14th of september, we think much of our songfestivals, but in our more or less daily lives the songs are not that important and skiing usually comes to us through television when Kiku is in the competition, Estonian food, we are more likely to think of kama, and to scare foreigners. Of course I am talking about the avagrage and big picture when describing the contradictions of our saying "our culture is foundation stone of our nation and country" and choosing to have it in our lives in quite limited days. The point here might be that I would relly like to think how to see the Estonian culture in our everydaylives, to make it closer to people, because that is a way to intergrate people from different nationalities, and people among the culture itself.

I came here and knew that the German culture is not so concrete thing- they are often looking for the American way of life perhaps and you would not see the "German dances" performance here, at least when sober people doing it. But they have their deep side of the culture, connected with their Germany and their part of the country. And it easy for the newcommers or immigrants or minorities to take over the daily "German things", because they are not thought as these holy relics, like our flag and language sometimes are considered. Because then the other nationalities here can produce their own micture, keeping their identity, former natinality and traditions and becoming step-by-step more German.

Today was my first break-in to a house...That is for real, but not so out of borders as it might sound. I explain it, an adventure though.
So I was with the two girls I live with at the moment(they will leave in a couple of days), the others went drinking bear with the guys we were with, but we went home as it is three o´clock in the morning. We had one key, my key and that one did not open the door down the stair. So i climbed a bit to reach the coridor window, opened it with a fork, fortunately quite tall, I had with my in the bag and in five minutes we were in. (A key- always have a fork with you!)

Besides being in the park, where the most exiting thing was that me and Birgitte were with our legs in one bag because it was quite cold sitting in the park. And there was a fox there running around as, so we, as germans, would yell "Fix, fix, fix!".
If I would say a few words about the people, I would like to concentrate on Fritz. He is such an interesting "typ". He has lived here in DDR for his whole life, but he was against it. He has been connected with music, also provocative music. He has spent a few days in yail for that. He looks like a hippy, but he is Fritz- term as itself, own category. He belives in people and he likes to open doors for young people, as he has said. And the story with Brigitte is that I have know her for only 12 hours, but we feel like we had been best for ages. She has a very interesting and inspiring nature- this soft and cheerful and quick, her own way. In a conversation with her I understood that being away from her country is placing yourself in a uncomfortable zone, but that does not mean you would be out of balance, becaause the fact that there are your relatives and family, friends, who are stable in their own lives, means I can go around, travel, but I still have this stable element with me in my memories. And the other thought, how Things "go as in films" means they go very fast, and being as a sidewatcher, cannot enjoy the process or appreciate the goals so much that would not enjoy the moment.

And the concert- international concert, was so nice. My favourite was the Oriental dancing group- an indian man and two ladies. I thought I would even go nto that training- learn Bollywood dances myself, that would be funny. The others were sweet who sang, especially one student who sang "Norah Jones".

Soo the first day, it seems as if it had the lenght of a couple of days...

When this spanish guy appeared at my door, I sure was suprised. He is basically a neighbour of mine and also a volunteer. The cutest was that he brought food. He did most of the cooking, although I got my hands also white. Just moments when I asked "are you sure you want me to put the salt to our pasta" were quite funny, but this situation-comic, I know cannot be given foward and I could not put you all guys to my kitchen to view those moments. Finishing the food-stories- he left me the hering (that was actually quite awful and would have ruined the tasty pasta and wine) for breakfast for me.

So my first lessons learning german in here were with Raffa on that evening. We tried to learn it putting the postis everywhere, including on ourselves, so he would get the “stilvoll ” und “r Designer” and I “lustig”, "e Schmetterling", "s Handy". It was quite a lot of fun at least.

In the night we went for a walk, because it was a very nice and warm evening, beasides I could need it after two days of sitting in the bus. As it was night we could enjoy walking on the rails of tram for kilometer at least before the first tram came.

As we were sitting there on the green area- that is suppose to separate the different roads from each other- and talking about different topics, basically still about cultural differences. It is quite interesting that we were the cultural differences, with our behaviour and way of seeing life. I would bring out the fact how he mentioned that they in spain never would use describing sentences or say something like "this is..., there are..." already the language is such... I could not have formed a clear picture of that topic that means I have not been an observer of intercultural communication, I am in it, though. The easiest way to illustrate that is by adding a normal thing in our talks- “Again- can you repeat that”, what can be said even 10 times in one topic! But sometimes we I would explain him one thought for like ten minutes and eventually when he thinks that he has understood, he reflects it back to me and we was totally in the bush, at those moments the best phrase is “das ist egal”- his first phrase he should know by now. When we started our converstion, I had noticed only a few stars in the sky and we had quessed where the Moon would be, but when we finished, the clouds that were already gone and all the stars were visible- amazing!

I quess that is the first challange for me and the first thing I will learn- how to express myself in a more easier and more logical way, so there would be less of those “Again”- s.

The morning, as I start writing about my two mornings, it is morning, it is good to say- good morning!

The yesterday morning was a very different. I would wake up two minutes before the phone of Raffa would ring (why that, is a longer story), quite fastly and suddenly I was awake. At that time I did not have my flatmates yet- they were in Ljubliana. I went to the kitchen. The next thing that came out of me was a scream, because there was a man behind my window, smiling at my behaviour. Then I ran to my room to put something on, because I was not dressed actually, not much. So the thing is that there workmen are renovating my bilding and at 8 there was one behind my window, but I ndid not know they would start so early and would be behind my window, in a few moments time there was another man on my balcony. So then I had my hering- Raffa had left me wine and hering, and I chose then the last one.
Today the workmen started at 7 and now it is already very-very annoying, I cannot write anymore, because my head is acking already from the noise...

This is quite a good time to speak about the things that happened yesterday, now it is already yesterday, wow. I will chllange myself to describe the scenery and atmosphere, what are very important in this case, I hope you can feel and sense this also.

As I was already at home and started listening to music, it was a suprise to me that a quest- Raffael- had arrived. This latino, cute and tall guy who came to visit me. Hea had taken food and wine with him so we could enjoy it. He is an excellent cook I must say. Only not so good was a hering in a marinade that he had bought and that happened to be my breakfast, because it is so-so. Having conversations, postiting the rooms and walking outside, he was so cute to try to explain me everything. So for example at one moment in the tramstation he pointed my attention to the fact that sometimes they make here timetables shorter by putting hournumbers like 12-15 when the minutes war the same.

The two moments when were so magical and almost like in the films- these silly little things I do. We were walking in the middle of the night in the middle of the tramway on the rails, holding the balance. From time to time, when trams passed, we jumped on the pavement.

The name and appearance of this blog was inspired by a rabbit I saw between the houses, about two meteres away from me. At that time was night and I came home to home.

The First day

Arrival. Suprise! I come a day earlier :D I did not plan it for long but this just came out - they thought I would arrive tomorrow...

It has been my first day, so wonderful that I cannot leave aside any part- from the spanish guy to a rabbit.
I will start off from here, where am I at the moment, tell how I got here and then about my new aquitances of today.

Just before that I hope you will bare with me and imagine the surrounding, where I am at the moment. In my appartment, there is a big couch on the wall the flag of gemany and the map of germany, in the hand i have a cherry tea, suprise suprise in a cup with a german flag and if we would go down to my personal staff we would see a german bag, also very important to me( a gift from dear Piret).

Some of you might remember more closely and vividly my bike, others seen it from the distance...So as much as I wanted to take it with me, I achived it, at least till Riga. And so it was. Now my bike will enjoy the sunshine and raindrops of Tallinn like you. sO in Tallinn the busdriver spoke to me in russian how "seda romu" heh my bike, cannot be excepted in busses but told me that I could try. In Riga they do not have enough space and then I took the bike back to the city.

The next place where I thought it was good that I did not have the bike, after listening 5 hours of russian conversations and Tattoo music together, was in Erfurt. There I understood that I had been misunderstood- so I have to take several trains to get to Jena.

This is where I can continue at night.

The beginning

To be honest, this is not the beginning for me- my I could even say that my EVS started two years ago when I decided to have this experience. The changes that are happening with me in my EVS started also before, a year or two earlier, but the bigger is my responsibility to myself now to apply them in my life.

To start of with my blogging it would be fair if I would say something general and introductory:
What? I do an Volunteer Service for a year in Germany, Jena.
Why? It is just a period of time when I have to figure out who am I and what do I want and EVS is the best way to challange myself.
When? It started in the second half of June when I got one morning on the bus to drive here for two days.
What again... I work in a kindergarten where they have Montessori method, a specific way to help children develop into healthy kids. I will take on my responsibilities as handcraft making and sometimes music lesson. Will now for more on the second week.
So you are invited to visit me and hear about my adventures.
It has began, but I do not yet what that "it" is. But it sure must be something very exciting and magic.

How can I save the world?

As I am going to be a volunteer in some weeks, I am constantly thinking, so what can I do, what can I change? As the slogan for EVS basically is to change the world, then it is natural that I am trying to go also that way...

I have to start changing the world from myself, that is for sure. So I thought, as a little exaggeration to be a moving reminder of the importance of changes. I ride mostly with a cycle and eating healthily, exercising regularily, take into account others ect. So as I always wear a "Love the planet " cotton bag when I ride with the bike, and plan to write on my wooden frok "We are what me eat" I am really advertising healthy harmonic lifestyles. This is my plan no 1 how could i save the world, at least my little world...When others are fascinated by my fascination, then it is another step foward.

Of course the other part is that I take in here all the thoughts, inspirational events, the methods in the kindergarten and use those in Estonia, apply in my future projects. Having said that, I feel to have lifted the responsibility on the future, so I have to say that to some extent I will apply that in my futureprojects.