Feelings, attitudes

It is difficult to define my feelings. But as compared with other objects it is easier. The way I am perceived, adjusted, tuned in (phrase used usually talking about radio frequencies, but if using allegory: what frequency I am on either sad, hoping, romantic or blue). So if I feel good I see the life around me in tight colours.
Sometimes I feel like a snowflake, like a feather: life is easy, everything that is start doing goes with flying colours. In those situations I feel really brave and tomorrow does not matter.
But contrariwise to this positive view on life I on the other hand see myself as a rock: fell in the water, stuck in the bottom and not having any willingness to improve, achieve or to act on something. And to say this does not rock, only if a person has the feeling, sits on a couch and has a Rock in ones hand, I have not tried it but some tend to do it often.
Now only think I think about how to be easy-going( a snowflake) more often. And when I am a snowflake, then I must meet also others like me so in one second life can be so good that one does not have the words even to describe it. So enough with the rocks I will be a snowflake from three minutes before four, then I have three minutes to go before my life so called new life starts. If I should put 10 cents to a pig each time I say it to myself, I would have a thousand krons to spend. What would I but? Two pens and gifts for my friends and also in a week each day eating out with friends. Yes. Now I am even a bit sad that this time I will really start a new life. Hah!